Jupiter Ascending
by Felipe Rosa
Jupiter Ascending: the Wachowski siblings present a high-concept story that doesn’t make much (or any) sense,
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: action, bottom, sci fi
Tag: bottom
Spring Breakers
by Felipe Rosa
Spring Breakers: a sliver of a story, which is neither interesting, exciting nor funny, concocted together by almost random, abstract, exploitative images. If there is any rhyme, reason or irony to this film, I missed it. (I have no qualms with amorality tales, but I prefer the ones that have any qualities in them.)
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: bottom, crime
The Man with the Iron Fists
by Felipe Rosa
The Man with the Iron Fists: not much in this film that was not done before, and probably better, by films that were already bad. The acting is flat, the dialogues are laughable, the story as well. The only purpose of this seems to be the extremely gruesome deaths; maybe that was the goal, but that doesn’t mean that if it aims to be bad and succeeds, that makes it any good.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: action, bottom, fantasy
Lola Versus
by Felipe Rosa
Lola Versus: the cast seems to be sleepwalking through this film, but they can’t hard be blamed. The screenplay is lifeless, senseless, inorganic; the characters, flat and boring. So I won’t be misunderstood: this is a very weak film.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: bottom, comedy
Snow White and the Huntsman
by Felipe Rosa
Snow White and the Huntsman: apparently every story must be retold as an epic struggle against tyranny and evil, complete with its own Agincourt speech; of course, by doing so, they all start to resemble, with the elements that defined it originally appear tacked in to justify the name. It has some visual flair, but the main elements (story and acting) are just not there.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: action, bottom, fantasy
An Officer and a Gentleman
by Felipe Rosa
An Officer and a Gentleman: at best, this is a movie that has not aged gracefully. Between the hammyness if the acting, the overblown story where machiavellianism rules and the bad 80’s music, this almost feels like a movie from another planet.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: bottom, drama
Bad Teacher
by Felipe Rosa
Bad Teacher: for once, the marketing didn’t lie. The trailers suggested one of the worst movies of the year, and by golly, until Uwe Boll gets something released, this is the one.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: bottom, comedy
Happythankyoumoreplease
by Felipe Rosa
Happythankyoumoreplease: out of the 7 or 8 relationships in this rushed, underdeveloped, badly written film, about half of one is worth paying attention to. The characters are uninteresting, too. And I wonder why the decision to go handheld/steadicam was taken: it doesn’t make sense to the story. Unhappythankyoucanigohomenow.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: bottom, romantic comedy
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time
by Felipe Rosa
Prince of Persia: The Sands of Time: Mike Newell, really? C’mon, how can the man the directed Al Pacino in one of his best roles of the last 20-30 years have fallen so low? Oh, well, what did I expect? Dumb, and that’s what I got.
Categories: Film reviews • Tags: action, bottom, fantasy
Fifth about The Seventh 